so basically

so basically i've given up my fight to figure out what's wrong with me. Doctors are just working for themselves, promoting the latest medicines, relieving symptoms and masking illnesses. Its become the land of "here's another pill, pay me another 500 bucks". So i'll give up and follow. Take a pill and take another. But for my children, that will never be the case.
Thats what i said last week. Now i'm sicker than ever.
So now i'm waiting for a list of doctors, maybe they will help me???

update

so it turns out i'm allergic to weeds trees and cocaroaches.
why does it take 2 years for a doctor to refer me to a stinkin allergist? why does it take 2 years of complaining? I should sue for emotional distress! now i'm on meds so i shouldnt get sick so often! geez. and even though i gave my work plenty of doctors notes that is one of the main reasons why "they don't have any availability for me next year". whatever!
so i need a new job. i was looking anyways. i hate people. they are so selfish. (not all people). but i try to do nice things, care for them, not put blame on anyone, create peace, i don't rat anyone out, i give them hugs when they need them, and what do they do? spit in my face practically.
its a good thing i was at least greatly appreciated by the parents of the children i worked with this year.
i learned everything from those preschoolers. and i learned being nice doesnt get you anywhere. its a good thing i'm working for the lord. and i only have 4 more days of hell on earth. (those kids fill me up and they are worth it.)

i have a few job options though, there is a slight possiblity at the preschool at church, an early ed center (i'm calling on monday to schedule an interview), and another ta position for 3 hours a day. oh yeah, LA's Best afterschool program. i wont know about that one till august. and then theres Starbucks. Woopie!

and that is only 2 out of three headaches thats been figured out. 1)scoliosis and pinched nerve in my neck, 2) allergies, 3) ????????

im sick again

so i'm sick, again, whats up with that? and more than sick, my head hurts i'm weak, sinus pressure, sneezing, coughing, i can walk around sometimes, and get this!!! Low temperature, you would think it would be high temp like a fever but its low, once it got to 95.6 degrees!!! now its fluxuating from about 96.5 to 97.2 degrees. so i should see the doctor tomorrow, maybe. thats scaring me. on top of everything else going on. and i had an in class essay today but didnt go because of this, and yesterday i had class and tomorrow night is my dance midterm and i probably wont go because of this and the teacher i work for is giving me a hard time for being gone this week. i was there yesterday for a few hours but i couldnt hold on. so i went home. i'm eating healthy, taking new vitamins with B and A and C and zinc and all that, so whats the deal? I'm seeing a chiropractor and he's finally straightening me out (literally!) so thats helping a great deal....i'm just tired of feeling like this, i always get sick, but when i see the doctor they say "well all your vitals look good so nothing is wrong...." then why do i still feel like crap and why do i get sick alot and when its a mild sickness why does it get in the way of every day life???? i'm tired of it. my temperature is usualy around 97.6 so that is my average. but hypothermia is 95.1 and i'm getting close to that one!!! geez. i hate this body i've been given, it may look nice but it really is driving me crazy, with all this hypoglycemia and possible thyroid problems....who can live like this?? i cant....

Letter to friend

i'm not feeling well so i'm home today. but my womens small group isnt having their social on friday so i'm gonna lead it okay?
I went to the chiropractor yesterday and he said i had scoliosis and a pinched nerve. so i'm going again tomorrow and friday and gonna get treated. i also went o the massage therapist and they said that my muscles were so bad that i needed to come in more otherwise i will wake up one day and not be able to move my neck at all. so that is why i feel like crap all the time, on top of hypoglycemia (which i just found out that the symptoms resemble stress symptoms.) and the reason why i feel like more crap every once in a while is because our bodies like to naturally get rid of toxins in our bodies. so its best to fast every once in a while to get rid of them faster and better. thats why the jews were always so healthy.
anyways, i'm sick again!!! geez it never stops with me.
i love you,
call me or not cuz im not up to phone stuff cuz of not feeling well...

my health

honestly i think i might actually be really sick. much more than just the normal cold or something. please pray for me. i'm going to the doctor today. I called and asked them about a certain symptom i had today and they were like okay youre comming in today. i'll go around 3pm.